Dear Friends,
Gil is building the progression of effort in practice. The initiating effort gets us going, perhaps again and again. Then we can make choices where we will put the effort – to something helpful or not helpful. Then we develop some level of relaxed persistence, some continuity of practice. Gil describes these as “what we offer” – it’s energy we’re putting into the practice.
For the fourth aspect of viriya, Gil says, “a kind of momentum or movement happens — something is being done to us. Rather than we ourselves practicing, we are being practiced.”
https://www.audiodharma.org/talks/11101
Gil shares some metaphors for this, that the previous effort puts together the conditions for the seed to grow; the boulder is moved, so a spring can flow.
I can relate to it more from days when I used play in my high school jazz band. I was more in the first few “doing” phases of effort – feeling like I had to be in control, over and over, putting in the effort, and as I continued, I did get into some continuity of practice. But I never really got into this momentum of practice. I can hear when folks are expressing that momentum – the music flows through them rather than the tightness I had around my playing.
When I first started my meditation practice, it was in many ways similar to my jazz band days – rather than being mindful of breathing, I’d find myself controlling the breath, and getting tight about it. With time and practice creating the conditions, a momentum does build. Gil says, “it becomes almost second nature to be alert and present. … We clear the ground, and let go of the distractions in order to allow this kind of energy or aliveness to move through us.”
As I was progressing through the mindfulness of breathing course, one of the practices I took on before sitting to meditate would be to touch a door knob on the way to sit, as if to hang up my worries and planning for this practice. I would literally say, “I’ll come back to you later, but for now, I’m going to meditate.” Somehow, that small gesture was a way I could clear some of distractions and allow the momentum of practice to flow through.
Poem:
This poem from Mary Oliver reminds me at the start of the wrong kind of effort, the over-controlling kind that is counter to this flow of momentum that Gil is talking about here. And in releasing that controlling, to sing.
I Worried
I worried a lot. Will the garden grow, will the rivers
flow in the right direction, will the earth turn
as it was taught, and if not how shall
I correct it?Was I right, was I wrong, will I be forgiven,
can I do better?Will I ever be able to sing, even the sparrows
can do it and I am, well,
hopeless.Is my eyesight fading or am I just imagining it,
am I going to get rheumatism,
lockjaw, dementia?Finally I saw that worrying had come to nothing.
“I Worried” by Mary Oliver, from Swan: Poems and Prose Poems
And gave it up. And took my old body
and went out into the morning,
and sang.
https://www.ayearofbeinghere.com/2013/04/mary-oliver-i-worried.html
Meditation:
For whatever meditation you do today, perhaps see if there’s a way you can create a clearing for your practice, to put down the worries and plans just for these few moments.
Here’s a 17 minute meditation from Tara Brach, which she describes: “This meditation awakens us through the body, and then invites us to rest in that vast presence that includes the changing flow of life. When we inhabit that openness, there’s a natural arising of peace, wakefulness and tenderness.”
https://www.dharmaseed.org/talks/74303/
With good wishes,
Andrea